Crashed When I Moved In
It scares me! Coming out, to my friends and family I mean. I know what is going to happen they will disown me, cut my off financially, and I will have nowhere to go. I hope this day does not come for a long time. Where will I go? How will I survive I'm still in highschool? What will I do to live off of? I am so scared. When this day comes I will have so many foes, and barely any allies. Right now I don't even think, I have any allies that could help me. I mean I do, but they live in NC. Thats the price for being Southern, Mormon, and privileged I guess. However I suspect it will be within the next year. With a guy I was in a relationship back in Febuary, running his mouth. People are talking once my parents pick up on this through the grapevine. They will realize it. There have been so many signs over the years. I am so scared. Why couldn't I have kept my mouth shut to him, and stopped my hormones in their track. I felt that he was the one, I thought everything was all alright. It wasn't he didn't want anything, but a quickie that I refused to give him. So he leaves, and now his yapper is running more then ever. I only pray everything will be okay. However I know deep down inside my days are numbered. No Allies, No Money, and nowwhere to Turn. There is a Tragedy right there for you.
On another note I worked tonight. I really dislike my place of work. I love kids, but I hate these little spoiled brats who come in here and start acting all tough. It's funny because so many times, when I have been in the rat suit. I bump into kids knocking them over, hurting them, and I blame it on poor eyesight. Revenge is so sweet.
I have the biggest urge to go dancing. It's about to kill me. When I was at Duke. I went dancing all the time at Avalon in Chapel Hill. There is just something about it that I love. Being hot, sweaty, and just going with the flow I love. I was told I dance like a black girl, and I can dip it low, and pick it up and roll it all around and pop my thang. I love it. There is nowwhere around here to dance. I can't drive until I turn 18 in a few months. I want to go to a club, preferably a gay one. I've never really been around gay culture. I'm eager to taste it for once in reality, instead of through books and TV. I want to dance to " Loose Control", " 1,2 step", "Oh"," Pass that Dutch","Get Yer Freak On","Pon De Replay", " Touch", "Milkshake"..... I wanna go dancing. Who lives in Atlanta, and wants to take a gay guy to see his first gay club? Hell I'll go with anyone. I WANNA GET OUT AND SEE MIDTOWN!!!!!!
I want to go to Mid-Town and gay dance club. Any takers in ATL? I am being serious people.
More then that, I wanna first kiss. I wanna hold someone. I wanna cuddle. I wanna feel something for someone. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT, it's about to kill me. I have knowone to truly talk to. Except a few people I have met online. They aren't the same like a real person. I want a real person and I want them soon. I WANNA GET LAID!!!!
My mom is sick. I fear the worst. I came home from Duke early because they found 6 growths in her. It's cancer phase 2 nearly 3. We are selling the house to pay for her surgery, and treatment. Please pray.
Cheers Loves,
Tragedy
On another note I worked tonight. I really dislike my place of work. I love kids, but I hate these little spoiled brats who come in here and start acting all tough. It's funny because so many times, when I have been in the rat suit. I bump into kids knocking them over, hurting them, and I blame it on poor eyesight. Revenge is so sweet.
I have the biggest urge to go dancing. It's about to kill me. When I was at Duke. I went dancing all the time at Avalon in Chapel Hill. There is just something about it that I love. Being hot, sweaty, and just going with the flow I love. I was told I dance like a black girl, and I can dip it low, and pick it up and roll it all around and pop my thang. I love it. There is nowwhere around here to dance. I can't drive until I turn 18 in a few months. I want to go to a club, preferably a gay one. I've never really been around gay culture. I'm eager to taste it for once in reality, instead of through books and TV. I want to dance to " Loose Control", " 1,2 step", "Oh"," Pass that Dutch","Get Yer Freak On","Pon De Replay", " Touch", "Milkshake"..... I wanna go dancing. Who lives in Atlanta, and wants to take a gay guy to see his first gay club? Hell I'll go with anyone. I WANNA GET OUT AND SEE MIDTOWN!!!!!!
I want to go to Mid-Town and gay dance club. Any takers in ATL? I am being serious people.
More then that, I wanna first kiss. I wanna hold someone. I wanna cuddle. I wanna feel something for someone. GOD FUCKING DAMNIT, it's about to kill me. I have knowone to truly talk to. Except a few people I have met online. They aren't the same like a real person. I want a real person and I want them soon. I WANNA GET LAID!!!!
My mom is sick. I fear the worst. I came home from Duke early because they found 6 growths in her. It's cancer phase 2 nearly 3. We are selling the house to pay for her surgery, and treatment. Please pray.
Cheers Loves,
Tragedy
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